By:  Lanora Campbell

Have you ever asked yourself “Do I show myself friendly?”  Do I welcome a new person visiting Sabbath services or perhaps maybe they are visiting a Feast site for the first time?  What do you think their first impression would be of you or the congregation as a whole?  Are you just visiting with each other, talking about yourselves or do you welcome them and make them feel comfortable?  Do you take them around and introduce them to as many people as you can in order to put them at ease?  Do you make them feel like they are part of the Church of God family?  Do you think they would say “I’ve made a mistake coming here” or would they say “This feels like home and I’m glad I came.” Will they want to come back?  These are all good questions and something we should give some thought to when a new member or a Church of God member visits.

Did you know you have about 7 seconds to make a first impression?  Have you ever stopped to think about how other people perceive you when they meet you for the first time?  Are you unapproachable and reserved or do you have an inviting smile that says “I’d like to get to know you?”

One of the worst and best examples I can use is to use myself.  I hope that you don’t make the same mistake that I made years ago on failing to make a good first impression.

It was a Sabbath day, a time when not only I but the congregation as a whole failed to make a visiting mother and daughter feel welcome.  These two were in town visiting family and decided to attend Sabbath services with one of the Church of God congregations.  It is something that I said I would never let happen again.  In my mind I can still see the mother and daughters expressions.  It was a look of feeling and being alone.  Yes, I know visiting a strange place where you don’t know anyone can be daunting.  I’ve been there and I’m sure you have too at one time or another. So there I stood doing nothing.  It was a lesson I will never forget because it is forever burned into my mind and heart.  I still think about how God is going to judge me on failing to be a Representative for Him through my own actions or lack thereof.  I never thought of myself as a Representative of God until I heard a Feast sermon about it and it made me think of this story and how I had failed that Sabbath day.

It was that very same Sabbath that everyone around me was visiting with each other while the visiting Church of God member was left alone.  During a conversation with a friend, as I was trying so intently to listen to what they were saying I was also watching the mother and her daughter sitting in a corner alone. They sat there observing others laughing and visiting with each other.  I still ask myself, why didn’t I go and talk to them.  Could it have been fear of rejection?  I knew that couldn’t be the reason because I had been in sales most of my life.  Was it I just wasn’t up to the conversation at the time?  I still don’t have the answer to that nagging question.  I could excuse it away if I chose to but that is not what God wants me to do.  It is a reminder of what he wants me to learn.  I needed to change my behavior as a Christian in showing myself friendly and exercising the love of Christ in me.  I had to ask myself is that how I wanted to be remembered as an unfriendly member and Representative of the Church of God?  I had failed in making a first good impression and I would never be able to get those 7 seconds back.  Wouldn’t it be better for people you meet for the first time to go away saying “I loved visiting here; I feel part of the family, they made me feel so welcome and I can’t wait to return for another visit?”  Isn’t that the image we want to have in our minds?   I know I certainly do rather than the one I am left with today.

These are some simple actions that each of us can put into practice so that in those 7 precious seconds you can show yourself friendly.  These principles can be applied at your work as well.

1. Don’t wait for the new member or Church of God visitor to come to you, go to them.  When you meet someone for the first time make sure your attitude is in line with God’s Word.  People can pick up on your attitude when you first meet them.  Are you a negative or positive person?  People don’t want to be around a negative person, so be positive and show yourself friendly.
2. Project yourself with confidence by relying on God’s Spirit to guide you.
3. Above all smile, it shows people you are friendly and approachable.
4. Say your name clearly and be quick to shake hands or give them a quick hug when you first meet because it will put them at ease.  Take them around and introduce them to other members of the congregation.
5. During your conversations don’t talk about yourself but make the conversation about them.  Repeat their name in the conversations so you will remember it.  Ask questions like where are they from, about their family; listen to them because it shows you genuinely have an interest in what they are saying.  It makes them feel special and shows them you really do care and that you want to get to know them personally.
6. Make eye contact with them it will show them you are an active listener.
7. When the other person is speaking lean in slightly it shows your interest in the subject they are speaking about but make sure not to invade their space.  Be a good listener!

If you were to rate yourself from 1 to 10 (1 being poor to 10 being great) on a first impression how do you think you would do?  Do you leave someone wanting to know more about you, the congregation you attend, our Great Father in heaven, our Lord and Savior that you serve and represent or do you leave them with an impression of being unfriendly, not interested, and unimpressed to never return for a visit again?

Take the test see what your score is.  Did you do well or do you need improvement on your first impression of showing yourself friendly?   Look within yourself and say how would God want me to represent Him?  Do others see Christ living in me?  We are God’s Representatives, His chosen family and we should always strive to make a good impression with everyone we meet.  You never know when God will use you and your actions to call someone into the Body of Christ.   But also remember your actions can have a negative impact as well, it could cause people to stumble and become discouraged and not want to return to any congregation.

So go ahead give it a test run “Show Yourself Friendly” and smile “Make a Good First Impression” as a Representative of God.  Remember you have 7 seconds so make it count!